1 - When will they sleep through the night?
Most babies will wake up during the night for at least the first 4-5 months of life. Babies, especially newborns, need to eat every few hours because their stomachs are so small and are designed to wake as a self-protection mechanism. Many consider “sleeping through the night”  when they are sleeping 5-6 hours and this may be their longest stretch, although they will sleep another 5-6 hours and still wake to feed every 1-3 hours. Babies 0-3 months will sleep 14-17 hours per 24-hour time frame and babies 4-12 months will sleep 12-16 hours per day, including nap times. Some babies will not sleep through the night until after 12 months, especially if they are breastfeeding. There are many sleep specialists, some of whom recommend “crying it out” and others that offer plans that just encourage the baby to learn to go back to sleep on their own. Babies respond to different methods and each has its own needs and personality. You should make the decision that feels right to you, and what is best for your family. A great sleep book is “The No-Cry Sleep Solution” by Elizabeth Pantley. https://www.nocrysolution.com/books/the-no-cry-sleep-solution-for-newborns/ 

2 - They make so much noise sleeping/breathing, is this normal?
Newborn sleep patterns are short and erratic, and many will make noises while sleeping, some more than others. This is due to their immature nervous system and reflexes which results in them being restless, moving, and jolting frequently. Also, newborn’s nasal passages are narrow so they may produce a variety of noises--grunting, gurgling, squeaks, and snorting--and are all common. They may not necessarily be waking up, so you can wait and see if they are just making noises while they are asleep.  

3 - How do you know if they are getting enough milk breastfeeding? And how much should they get if they are bottle feeding?

The most important way to get breastfeeding off to a good start is by assuring they have a good latch and plenty of time at the breast. Lactation support should be called in just to make sure and especially if there is any concern! It will take a week or two for nursing babies to establish a consistent feeding supply, and getting the milk supply established as soon as possible will help determine the production later on. Knowing if they are getting enough in the first week will be apparent by the number of wet/poopy diapers and by watching their weight. They will lose up to 10% of their weight as the milk is coming in and should regain their birth weight by 8-12 days, and some, successfully breastfeeding, rooming-in, skin-to-skin bonding may have their weight gained back within 4-5 days. The amazing “liquid gold” colostrum is packed full of antibodies, vitamins, minerals, growth factors, and proteins and is designed to sustain them until the milk transitions, assuming they are nursing productively. Newborns should be fed at least every 2-3 hours for the first couple weeks, or at least 12 times per 24 hours, and they should typically feed 15-20 min per side while nursing, but some may take shorter and some longer sessions, depending on the latch and the speed of the flow. The proper latch is much more important than the timing of the nursing sessions. Also, feeding on demand is recommended by many and it has been shown the more frequent short feedings will produce more milk and with more fat content than the longer infrequent sessions. While some babies catch on quicker than others, every baby is different and babies all need to learn how to effectively breastfeed. They may continue to suckle at the breast for comfort after they have removed the majority of the milk, and this is fine, however, you may feel like you are breastfeeding for hours on end! This would be an ok time to offer a pacifier, after you are sure they have consumed enough milk.
If formula feeding, an average calculation is 2.5 oz per pound of weight, per 24 hours. Typically they will eat 1-2 oz initially, then 2-4 oz as they grow, and eventually may eat 4-6 oz per feeding.
For breast pumping moms, if pumping supply seems to be low, here is a great resource! https://kellymom.com/hot-topics/pumping_decrease/

4 - Can you spoil a newborn? Can I hold them too much?
No and no! Newborns should be held close and comforted, as they were in the womb, and are not used to all the noises, lights, and sensations of the big world. They are used to your smell, your voice, and your presence, and will feel most comfortable and secure in your arms and even just next to you. This includes dad/partner too. Studies have shown that their breathing/respirations, heart tones, temperature, and nervous system all are better regulated by being on you or near you. They will develop and mature physically and emotionally quicker with the contact of you and your touch. Wearing babies is a wonderful way of comforting and soothing them and gives you a break from holding them all the time.

5 - Can I co-sleep with my baby?
Most pediatricians will tell you that it is not safe to co-sleep with your baby because of SIDS.  There are safe sleeping protocols that do allow you to sleep with your infants, and as long as these are met, sleeping with your baby is comfortable, convenient and you will both sleep better, especially if you are breastfeeding. Side-lying nursing is so great for late nights and comfortable feedings when you are exhausted, and so easy to do when co-sleeping. For the safety protocols, see Dr. Sears advice here:
https://www.askdrsears.com/topics/health-concerns/sleep-problems/sleep-safety/cosleeping-safely/ and more here https://www.askdrsears.com/news/latest-news/dr-sears-addresses-recent-co-sleeping-concerns/

6 - How often should they poop/pee?
A newborn should have at least one poop on the first day, and it will be the dark, green-blackish tar-like substance called meconium. Some find that olive oil is an effective way to clean the sticky poop from their soft skin. The colostrum from the first breastfeedings will help clear the meconium out quicker, after which it will transition to a yellow seedy poop. The second day should have 2 poops, and the third, 3 poops and increasing from there, additional poops each day through the first 7-10 days. Between 6 weeks and 3 months, the frequency changes and they could have one per day, and if breastfeeding, may go once per week, which is fine.

They should be having 1-2 wet diapers the first day, 2-3 wet diapers day two, and by day four, 4-6 wet diapers. After your breast milk comes in, they should be having 6-8 soaking wet diapers a day, and for formula feeding babies, they can have 6-10 wet diapers per day.

7 - How often should I feed him/her, and should I wake if they are sleeping?
Newborns should be fed every 2-3 hours, or at least 12 times every 24 hours and if they want to nurse more often in the beginning, that is great! It will stimulate the milk supply to establish quicker. They tend to be sleepy the first few days, from all the strenuous activity of birth, so you may need to wake them to feed. This is important so that one, your milk comes in, and two, they gain their weight back within the average 7-12 days. They can lose up to 10% of their birth weight, and if they lose more, most professionals will say the baby isn’t getting enough to eat. If formula feeding, you will still have to feed every 2-3 hours and wake them to feed at least until they pass their birth weight or until your doctor says you do not need to. If they are feeding plenty during the day and gaining weight, and they sleep longer than 3 hours during the night, it would be ok to let them sleep 4-5 hours at night, but each baby has different needs so it would be wise to check with your care provider.

8 - How soon do I need to bathe my newborn? What do I do if they hate it?
Newborns do not need to be bathed right away, and there are actual studies that show they shouldn’t be bathed right after their birth, as most hospitals used to do. The vernix can help as a bacteria barrier, blood sugar and temperature will be better balanced, and bonding and nursing will be improved by not bathing right away. Birth fluids will be wiped off, and then they will be fine for a week or two if you want to wait. They typically do not like their first bath, as it is chilling for them, and they are not used to being wet in the outside world. The first bathing should be a sponge bath, on a counter or even your lap, and in a warm room without drafts, and gently, gradually cleaning first the head and face, then wiping down mainly creases, under the chin, underarms and the diaper area. You can keep a towel on the parts of them that you aren’t cleaning so that they stay warm and comfortable. They shouldn’t be submerged in water until their umbilical cord falls off, and until their circumcision heals, which is usually within a couple of weeks. Even then, you do not have to bathe them daily, but you can if you want, and if they enjoy it! Here is some of the research on delayed bathing! https://childrensmd.org/browse-by-age-group/pregnancy-childbirth/delaying-babys-first-bath/ 

9 - Do I need to feed on both sides each time I am breastfeeding?
Breastfeeding for the first 4-6 weeks should include feeding on both sides each feeding, at least until the milk supply is well established. You should let them feed on one side until you see cues that they are full or sleepy and then offer the other side. If they do not feed much on the other side, that is ok, you can hand-express or pump to keep the supply up which is important in the beginning. Watch for hunger cues and feed sooner the next feeding if needed, starting with the opposite side each time. After your milk supply is well established, breasts should be emptied when feeding however you do not necessarily need to feed both sides while feeding. Some babies will empty the breast quicker than others, and the flow will vary as well. Also, the latch and visible transfer of milk as they swallow is a better indication of milk consumption than watching the clock. The supply-demand milk production is very efficient and will ebb and flow with growth spurts and leaps. 

10 - When should I move them to their bedroom to sleep?
This is a personal decision and does not need to be rushed. Newborns tend to sleep better near you and can be comfortably done in bassinets or in your bed as long as safety protocols are followed for co-sleeping (link shared above). They definitely should sleep in your room for at least 4-6 months, even up to a year which is also encouraged by the AAP. Some babies are noisy sleepers, which may make it tough for you to get good sleep, in which case you could move them further away from your bed and /or turn up the sound machine slightly. Dark rooms, sound machines, and the right temperature are all great tools for helping babies to sleep. Studies show keeping the room between 68-72 degrees helps them to be comfortable without getting overheated. It is also recommended that they shouldn’t be covered with loose blankets but in a warm sleeper or sleep sack. Here is more information on that! https://www.verywellfamily.com/home-temperature-for-a-new-baby-2633913

11 - How do I get my baby to stop crying?
Babies will cry if their needs aren't being met as they do not have any other method of communication. Some will cry more than others, and their personalities will shine through with this as they mature and develop. As newborns, there are the most common reasons for crying; hungry, tired, or digestive issues. It is important to begin to watch for cues from day one. They will have hunger cues (rooting) and sleepy cues (yawning/sleepy eyes) and digestive (clenching fists, drawing legs up to abdomen/stiffening, passing gas).
Feed as frequently as you see their cues, and know that they also like to suck for comfort. It is possible to overfeed a baby, more so from bottle-feeding than nursing, which would be evident with extra spit-up or gassiness. If they have been fed and still want to suck, you can offer your clean finger (nail side down) or a pacifier if breastfeeding/milk supply has been established.
It is important to watch for sleepy cues, and the awake time a baby has had. An overtired baby is no fun and often harder to get to sleep. Under 8 weeks their awake time is about 45-75 minutes, then after 8 weeks it will be 60-90 minutes, and at 4-6 months 1 hour 45 min to 2 hours 30 min, and on up from there. Nap times of course can vary anywhere from 20 min to ideally 2 hours. Getting them to sleep can be a struggle for many babies. Dr. Harvey Karp’s 5 S’s is a popular method of soothing a fussy baby: sucking, swinging, shushing, swaddling, and on their side or stomach.
For digestive issues, whether breastfeeding or formula feeding, troubleshooting can help to determine if it is just gas, taking in too much air nursing or bottle feeding, the type of formula or foods that were eaten if nursing, overfeeding, not burping enough, or effectively, or maybe just need to poop. Pace-feeding, holding upright after feeding, burping longer, bicycling their legs, massaging their tummy, and doing the “colic hold” facing the floor with their tummy against your forearm and their head towards your elbow, can all help with digestive upset.
Overall, these times will come and go, and know that you are not alone! Oftentimes just changing the environment, going outside for a walk, movement, or going for a drive can calm a fussy baby. Here is an article with more suggestions! Calming a Colicky Breastfeeding Baby 2016.pdf

12 - How do I get my baby to sleep?

As mentioned above, the 5 s’s are good tools to help a baby go to sleep. Oftentimes babies will nurse or feed to sleep and while this is ok, it is helpful to get them on a sleep-eat-play sequence so that they don’t associate eating with going to sleep. This will help later on. Sucking on a pacifier is soothing to them, and recommended after breastfeeding is established. Shushing has a calming effect on babies, probably due to the noises heard in the womb and there are many devices today that you can purchase, from a shusher to noise machines to apps on your phone. Swaddling is helpful as newborns are used to being confined as in the womb, although they will still have their immature nervous system reflexes when unswaddled until they physically develop. There are unlimited varieties out there, so experiment with them, and know that just a muslin blanket also works great with most babies! Swinging, or movement such as rocking, bouncing on an exercise ball, strolling and driving can all help babies go to sleep. There are now super fancy carrier/sleeping devices that move and assist babies to go to sleep, such as the Snoo, and these do work! But babies should have some of their sleep in a non moving device, bassinet, crib or co sleeper, so that they get used to sleeping still as well. The most effective movement carrier I know is to wear them. Look into the different baby wearing wraps and find one that works for you. They may fuss initially but most will go to sleep if you are walking or swaying with them cuddled next to you. Putting babies on their side or stomachs and rubbing their backs can be soothing to them, on you or in their sleeping area. There are varying opinions on putting babies to sleep on their stomachs, due to the proposed risk of SIDS, so make sure they are on a safe flat surface and check with your care provider if you have concerns, but many babies do prefer to sleep this way, and once they are rolling around will sleep however they are most comfortable. Here is more on that: https://www.askdrsears.com/topics/health-concerns/sleep-problems/sids/prefers-sleep-tummy/

13 - How much do I have to do tummy time? They don’t like it!
Tummy time, even from the newborn stage is an important physiological exercise that strengthens their back, shoulders, and neck, and progresses their motor skills to the next milestones of sitting, crawling and walking. They most likely will only be able to tolerate it for 2-5 minutes at a time in the beginning, but it is important to have some tummy time several times every day and they will get stronger and will be able to do it for longer the more they do it. This is typically done on the floor on a playmat or blanket, or in a crib or bassinet, but they can also do this laying on you as you are laying down, or reclining. It is important to support their neck until they gain enough strength to hold it up, and this will help.

14 - Do I need to swaddle them all the time?

As mentioned above, swaddling can be helpful to newborns who are used to being snug and secure as they were in the womb. They definitely do not need to be swaddled all the time, or even at all, and during waking hours it’s not necessary. They will startle and move their limbs (called the moro reflex) until their nervous system and reflexes have matured and developed. Some babies that are more restless or fussy may benefit more from swaddling, especially when sleeping, but I have also seen very calm babies that do not seem to need swaddling and they develop strength and may physically mature quicker because of their exercising movements. There are different methods of swaddling, and unlimited varieties out there, so experiment with them, and remember that just a muslin blanket works well too. It is important to not restrict the neck, and studies have also shown that their hips and legs shouldn’t be restricted due to the risk of hip dysplasia. There are swaddles that just constrict the arms and upper torso, which is better. Another point to note, make sure they are not too warm, as they can be with clothing and a swaddle blanket, and this is one of the concerns of professionals, that they will overheat. Be alert of the temperature in the room, and the layers of clothing on your baby. To swaddle or not to swaddle, many have opinions, and it seems there are pros and cons to both, so use your best judgement and if you have concerns, check with your care provider.

15 - Is it bad to use a pacifier?
No! Pacifiers can be a very useful tool for babies because sucking is a comfort measure for them, not only during feedings, but other times too. During the first few weeks of life, some recommend not to use a pacifier until breastfeeding and a successful latch is established, but there are others that will say that it doesn’t affect the success of nursing. There have also been studies regarding the benefits of pacifiers and it shows that it releases endorphins in the brain, and also is a potential method to reduce the risk of SIDS, according to the AAP. Overall it promotes relaxation, security, and is a helpful tool to encourage sleep.

16 - How do I care for the umbilical cord?
The umbilical cord should be kept dry until it falls off, which is usually within 10-14 days. You should keep to sponge baths until it dries up and falls off, and it shouldn’t need anything to be put on it. It is just like a scab, and may bleed slightly when the stump falls off. Things to watch for are if it gets red or swollen, or if it oozes any pus which may indicate an infection. This would be a time for prompt treatment with your care provider.  

17 - When is it safe to take my baby out in public?
This is also a personal choice as there are moms who get out right away, and moms that stay in for weeks. Getting outside in fresh air and sunlight is good for both mom and baby, and as long as mom is getting enough rest and recovery in the first few weeks, short outings can be beneficial. I don’t feel there is any need to keep your baby away from people, assuming they aren’t symptomatic with any illness or disease. It is pretty easy to keep distance from others, especially if you are wearing your baby while you are out. Again, this is up to you, and going with your gut - if it stresses you out, then it isn’t a good idea. If you are dying to get out and see people, then do it, just plan accordingly and know that it takes longer to do anything with a baby!

18 - How much is too much spit up?
Most babies will spit up some, some will spit up a lot, and there are some that won’t spit up hardly ever. The only time it would be of concern is if they are frequently spitting up, or vomiting the majority of their feedings. Most spit-ups happen if they are swallowing too much air while they are eating, or not being burped sufficiently after eating. It may be the case of an intolerance to a type of formula, which may take trial and error to find the best one. Frequent vomiting most of the feeding may indicate reflux, which is caused by an immature esophageal tract that allows gastric juices to irritate the lining. They usually will also get pretty fussy during and after the feedings. This is usually addressed with smaller feedings, more frequently, holding them more upright for feedings and afterwards, and in severe cases medications may be prescribed. Here is more from Dr. Sears on reflux. https://www.askdrsears.com/topics/health-concerns/childhood-illnesses/ger/ger-hidden-cause-colic/

19 - Does breastfeeding get easier? How long should I nurse my baby?
Breastfeeding is not always easy, especially in the beginning. It is crucial to get support right away, to minimize the challenges and frustrations that are common. Doulas, Lactation Specialists, and Lactation Consultants can be of much support to get things going right away, and even later down the road when you might hit other challenges. Pain and engorgement may be a challenge, and as there usually is some discomfort as nursing is getting going, a successful latch will greatly reduce the nipple pain that can happen with a shallow latch. Engorgement doesn’t always happen, but if it does, hand expression in a warm shower will help, or pumping to relieve the fullness, however definitely continue to breastfeed to keep the flow going. If you are determined to nurse your baby, spend the time and efforts in the beginning, and it will get easier. Not everyone is able to nurse successfully, and some may need to pump exclusively, but the benefits of breastfeeding are tremendous for you and your baby so it is worth all the effort. Some, including professionals, will say to nurse for at least 6 months, the point at which solid foods may be introduced. But many others will say nursing for at least 1 year gives your baby so much nutrition and antibodies, that nothing comes close to mothers milk. There are some that nurse for 2 or 3 years, and that is perfectly fine too. The longer you do, the more benefit they will get. 

20 - How long does it take to heal vaginally from the birth? There is a lot of soreness and pressure.
Depending on your personal pregnancy and birth story, there can be a dramatic difference in recovery time and healing. A non-complicated, non-traumatic birth will still take at least a couple of weeks for the soreness and pressure to be relieved, and those that have had either repair and/or surgery can take 3-6 weeks to get relief. The postpartum environment affects the healing time for all mamas. Women need to rest, be nourished, supported, and waited on so that bonding and healing happen favorably during this sacred time. There are also ways to assist vaginal healing; sitz baths with herbal remedies, herbal ice packs, staying off your feet (especially stairs), eating nourishing foods, and seeing a pelvic floor therapist can also help greatly.